detachment and suffering

In my religious searching, I've often stumbled on the concept of detachment as the goal of spiritual practice. I hear about this in some strands of Buddhism, and it's especially pronounced in the Bhagavad Gita. The Bhagavad Gita teaches two spiritual paths: one of personal devotion to the God Krishna, and one of pursuit of the eternal Brahman/spirit of the cosmos. Both teach a practice (yoga, in the broad sense. not in the solely physical practice as often understood in the US) of transcendence of passions and detachment from outcomes (both positive & negative). I think this formulation of ancient Indian religion was also part of the background of Buddhism. Certain aspects of Buddhism also teach this detachment. I've been reflecting a lot on my resistance to detachment. While a reduction of suffering is a noble and necessary goal - and a practice of contemplative detachment & presence is a good way to get at reduction of suffering - detachment seems like a peculiar way to live in the world. I've been told by many people that it isn't detachment as distance. Not like the goal is to be unaffected by anyone else, but rather to understand that there is something beyond the daily good and bad of life, beyond the ebb and flow of passions. I get that, and maybe I'm just stuck on the word detachment. My answer to suffering isn't detachment but engagement. It's to go deeper in relationships, in presence with others - in a sense, to attach more. I think it has a lot to do with cultural message of white manhood (where there's often a favorable emphasis on detachment, reduction of emotional response, and boldness in the face of difficult and potentially hurtful situations). Coming from that, the answer isn't further detachment but closer connection. Obviously, the goal isn't to be swept away by suffering, or to be rendered useless by the overwhelming nature of suffering in the world. So an element of touching the larger canvas of the universe (God, Brahman, ?Nirvana?) is important. I think part of the issue is how we understand transcendence, too. My theology professor, Mayra Rivera, has just published a book called "The Touch of Transcendence: A Postcolonial Theology of God" where she argues that "God is not within human grasp but always within human touch." It's about "transcendence within," which I think is what I'm trying to get at. I guess I have to read the book, eh?